Glee and American Horror Story creator Ryan Murphy has admitted that he has seen psychologists over a fear that his career could end at any moment.
The 55-year-old is one of the biggest names in the TV business and also one of the most prolific, with numerous projects on the go including Ratched, American Crime Story, Pose and The Politician.
In a new interview with the Just B podcast, Murphy revealed that coming of age during the AIDS crisis of the 1980s led to his desire to have multiple plates spinning.
"When I was growing up, when I came of age sexually, it was 1981," he said. "It was right when AIDS began, so I went through, as a gay man, the entire AIDS crisis in the '80s and into the 90s — from '81 until '96, when the cocktail came about. And every day of my life, I thought, 'OK, well, this is it. I'm not going to make it.'
"A lot of this, I put into this television show I did called Glee. That's a running theme on that show.
"So I always felt that I was on borrowed time. Like, I always felt that there was an expiration stamp on my ass, and I've been to many shrinks to talk about it.
"And it's almost like I still have that fear that it's all going to be taken away the next day. So it's very ingrained with my work ethic, where I'm like, I get an opportunity to create."
Murphy's next project is a film adaptation of the musical The Prom starring Meryl Streep, James Corden and Nicole Kidman which is due for release on Netflix on December 11.
