Bradley Davies has admitted that he fears for his future with Wales after being banned for the majority of the team's Grand Slam Six Nations campaign.
The lock received a seven-week suspension for a dangerous tip-tackle on Ireland's Donnacha Ryan during Wales's opening match of the tournament.
"Basically, I saw Donnacha Ryan counter-rucking on Adam Jones," Davies explained to the Western Mail. "I went to move him off the ruck. We had a bit of a tussle and I have basically just thrown him.
"I didn't really see the incident as it happened, it was so quick. I jogged to the next ruck and obviously the ref blew up.
"I didn't think I had done much wrong or that it was that bad, until I saw it on the big screen. It looked terrible then and I thought 'Oh heck'. I was just thinking 'I'm going here'."
Davies only received a yellow card for the incident, but Wales coach Warren Gatland said after the game that he deserved a red.
"I had been the starting number four for Wales for two games on the bounce," Davies added. "I felt I was in good form going into the Ireland match and I really wanted to prove to people that I was number one.
"I thought I started the game well and I kind of threw it away. I've been criticised publicly by the coaches, which is fair enough.
"I've probably cost myself my Welsh place for the foreseeable future because the others are playing well."
Wales next face the Barbarians at the Millennium Stadium in June before embarking on a three-Test tour to Australia.